So I'm 2 weeks away from taking the MD bar exam. I feel certain that I will fail, but oddly feel much better knowing that most everyone feels this way. Is that evil, to be happy at the consuming self-doubt of others? Maybe. I'm just glad to know that there aren't people running around out there who are disgustingly confident. M-Fer's if they are.
I don't feel prepared, but am coming down to the point where I just want it over with. I will have conquered the beast one way or another once they announce "pencils down." It will be over. I won't think of it again until November, when the scores come out. Like I said, I'm fully expecting to fail, but still here I am plugging away. It seems a hopeless cause, but still I forge on. One might think that this perseverance in the face of great adversity is most impressive and admirable. Maybe it is, but through all of this effort, I feel like I've alienated Matt. He doesn't get me, and worse yet, doesn't seem to want to.
He loves what he loves and loves what he does. His job is his hobby and all roads lead there. He's attracted to conversations about advertising trends and who is mayor of what on foursquare. I play along because it's fun, but it's not my life.
When we first met, I was a quirky creative girl who majored in film, updated my web page constantly (in old school HTML I might add) and dyed my hair on any whim. I was weird and wild and just his type. Now, I'm knee deep in Con Law, Torts, Con Crim Pro, Biz Orgs, MBE prep... blah blah blah. I don't even recognize me.
Does he?
